Thursday, March 26, 2009

Sean Hannity and the Order of Conservatism - Spoof

Godzilla has been in a "Harry Potter" phase lately. Actually, we all have. Big Tuna finally got around to reading the last two books. Anyway, Godzilla is currently reading "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (Year 3)." We also have the Harry Potter movies, so we have been watching them too. I have read all of the Harry Potter books so I can discuss the books with my kids.

The other night, Godzilla wanted to watch the "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" DVD. I was listening/watching sporadically as I performed our nightly routines. At one point I just stopped what I was doing because I thought to myself, "Gosh, this is eerily like what is going on in America today." So, as I sat down to watch the rest of the movie with Godzilla, my mind kept making comparisons of current issues with the movie. So here is my "Spoof" of the HP and the Order of the Phoenix:

Please indulge my silliness or turn away now.

"Sean Hannity and the Order of Conservatism"


In the first 100 days of the Obama Administration, Sean Hannity faces challenges at every turn, from the threat of He-Who-Must-Not-Be- Named and the unreliability of the liberal government of the U.S.A., to the rise of Michael S. Steel as the Chairman of the Republican National Committee. Along the way he learns about the strength of his friends, the fierceness of his enemies, and the meaning of sacrifice.

Conservative Cast:

Sean Hannity (Harry Potter) - Defender on Conservatism in the U.S.A. Target of many liberal politicians including the President. (I picture Sean with a scar on his forehead shaped as the letter "C" instead of a lightening bolt.) Leader of "Hannity's Army."

Rush Limbaugh (Ron Weasley) - Co-defender of Conservatism in the U.S.A. It is Rush’s talent on "loan from God", his heart, and humor that keep Americans informed on the evil doings of the current administration.

Ann Coulter (Hermione Grainger) - Ally to Sean and Rush, Ann is resourceful, principled and brilliant.

Ronald Reagan (Albus Dumbledore) - Okay, so he isn't alive but if he were. Ronald Reagan is considered one of the greatest Conservatist of modern times. He is particularly famous as the President of the U.S.A. (1980-1989), defeating liberal Jimmy Carter. During his presidency Ronald Reagan pursued policies that reflected his personal belief in individual freedom, brought changes domestically, both to the U.S. economy, and expanded military, and contributed to the end of the Cold War.

Hannity's Army (Dumbledore's Army) - Those dedicated to bringing the U.S.A. back to its conservative roots.

Taxeaters (Deatheaters) Cast:

President Obama (He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named) - Radical, most liberal president of the U.S.A. Formed close associations with radical creatures such as, Rev. Jeremiah Wright, ACORN, William Ayers. During this reign of terror, civil rights are being done away with as the government expands to take control of everything. Motto -"No crisis shall go to waste."

Rohm Emmanuel (Lucious Malfoy) - Second in command to HWMNBN. Emmanuel uses his position to wield considerable power to the Administration (aka "reign of terror").

Nancy Pelosi (Delores Umbridge) - Speaker of the House, Inquisitor, maker of rules to fit whatever she wants.

Taxeaters (Deathers) - The liberal, elected officials that continue to support and pass all of these atrocious "stimulus bills, bailouts, and budgets" of HWMNBN. The result will be "generational theft" to future generations.

Liberals (Dementors) - The minions that follow HWMNBN. Get too close to a liberal and every good feeling, every good memory will be sucked out of you. You will be left with nothing but the worst experiences of your life. They feed off positive human emotions; a large crowd is like a feast to them. They will drain a conservative if left with them too long.

Curses/Spells used by the Taxeaters:

Stupify Spell- A spell placed on individuals to render them senseless and turn them into a liberal.

Imperious Curse - One of the "Unforgivable Curses." This spell cause the victim to be completely under the command of the caster, causing the victim to do anything the caster wishes. Used in the House & Senate.

Cruciatus Curse - Also known as Obama's Budget Plan. Another "Unforgivable Curse." This curse cause the taxpayer to suffer intolerable financial pain as tax increases help to "spread the wealth around." Prolonged use of this curse can render the taxpayer insane.

Avada Kedavra Curse - Also known as Obama's Economic Stimulus Plan. The MOST unforgivable of the "Unforgivable Curses." This curse causes instant death to the free market system and the world as we know it. There is no counter curse and the result is that this debt will be passed along to our grandchildren's grandchildren.

Do you see any similarities? I could go on and on, but I have probably offended many by this point. I just thought it was ironic, eerie, and a little scary. It is funny in a not so funny sort of way. The way this country is heading has me terrified.


Vivian M said...

Oh that was wrong but so funny!

Sonia said...


I don't know the Harry Potter stories, but I am telling you that reads like a line for a good story... if it weren't true. It's not so good when you're in it...

Good writing, My Friend!